Dear Mother
Dear mother I dont think you like me anymore
You used to watch me sleep
no all you do is stare at the floor.
Oh Dear mother
I dont think you like me anymore
It used to be you and me
a paperbook and a magazine
Thats all we needed to get by.
No it seems things have changed
I think Im the one to blame.
Dear mother
I like you even more
Now mama sings:
Dear Caroline
I dont think I like you anymore
Cause when you got to drinkin
You put you in places you have never been before
Dear Caroline
I dont like you anymore
Why cant we just get a grip
on our mother to daughter relationship
Come to terms with truly how we feel
If we put our heads together
we would just stay home forever
Dear mother I think you like me after all
XO XO Debbie Doll
Like father like daughter
Of some reason Carsos parents thinks she has an alcoholproblem, well I will now clear this up once and for all.
As a parent you have a very big responsibility to be a rolemodel for your kids and sometimes they dont really succeed doin that
Daddy Baloo (Carsos dad) is now spending a few weeks in Spain with some friends and I asked them what they are fillin their days with...Well the day is not all they are fillin they are alo busy fillin themselves up with alcohol and hang around at the beach. So can you really blame Carso for being an alcoholic and spending her days drinking with friends when her dad is doin just the same? Can you really? Well you can only blame your parents for some of it the rest is in fact Carsos own fault.
Party on Baloo and Myggan!!!!
Xo Xo Debbie Doll
Take your mothers advice!
I remember when I was a little girl growing up. My mum bombarded me with all of those advices and rules to follow. I have to admit I often didn´t give a crap. Although I did´t recive candy from strangers or followed them home, because I hade a feeling something really creepy would happen.
But there is this one advice im started follow as an adult, and I now know how precious and important it is.
My mum used to alwas be nagging about wearing proper and clean panties, otherwise if an accident happened and the ambulance staff saw my dirty old nickers they would think my mum was a bad mum who didn´t know how to dress her little angel she always told me.
But I updated the old advice to suit me better, it now also includ- When you´re going to the pub/club etc:
Always shave your pussy!
Be prepared; you never know when you stumble in to a big nice cock!
Xo Xo Debbie Doll
Virgin Mary wasnt a virgin
Apparently she was known as holy and horny and had a brothel in the stable where she pleased the wise men and the shepherd. When she got knocked up she just blamed the holy spirit!
She must have been a hell of a smooth talker if she could convince a whole world that she managed to get a baby without gettin laid....
Wonder what Josef had to say about all this but sure he might just have been her pimp. Havin the most famous cheating wife is kind of a low price to pay when you think about it. Imagine how well his business should be after Jesus was born, could you get any better PR? And as if that wasnt enough he got published in the best seller the Bible so its a never ending PR chance for him.
Well done "virgin" Mary!
XO XO Debbie Doll
Disrespectful
Today when I would help Tina with her laundry I almost got croup. Tina booked the laundry room weeks ago, but what happened? The person who had the time before didn´t have the manners to get out in time. I gave the person sveral rings on the door and on the entry phone, but no answer. I even tried to look him/her up on eniro and hitta.se, but no luck. After an hour we gave up, any suggestions on how to get back? A prank maby?
Well his/hers adress is Kyrkgatan 78 appartment 8312 Östersund, R Andersson.
Feel free to pay a visit, bring a carvingknife, machine gun or my favourite a big bomb on your stomach -BOOOM
Better luck next time I guess, motherfuckers!
Xo Xo Debbie Doll
Doughnuts dont give you pubichair
Went over to Carsos house to get some real coffe (french dark strong just the way I like it)
Thought Id be safe there but her house is made of wood and I swear it will fall apart before the night is over.
Tryin to figure out the best and most safe place to be in this storm, maybe the basement or under a car or maybe I can dig a deep hole in the ground and hide in there.
Two and a half men has just started, love that show and the kid, Jake, is the man of my dreams he just told me that doughnuts dont give you hair on your balls when you are in puberty.
Life would be so much fun with him and if I get tired of him a can do his uncle.
Speakin of doin it I would like to know how chickens do it....have anyone ever seen a roosters cock? I would also like to know how worms are doin it. Another thing Ive been thinking about tonight is which pair of legs a centepiede (tusenfoting) are spreading when they are gettin shaged, I mean they have a few to choose from.
Blowin in the wind
The headline can mean two things dependin on your own preference. It can mean that Im blowing away in the wind, which isnt that weird since there is a fucking snowstorm in the Republic of Jamtland tonight. Not very easy to be a tiny little doll and walk home in the snow and wind. Tried do dig a tunnel under the snow and crawl my way home, was workin great until a drunken dog came and stepped on me. Lost my breath and thought I was gonna die but somehow I managed to get my ass home. I placed myself on the radiator to defrost.
The headline can also mean giving a blowjob in the wind. I feel sorry for that poor guy whom has to stick his cock out in the wind tonight, Wouldnt be very easy to blow him though since the cold would shrink his cock down to nothing. You would need a flashlight and a hot bottle to lurk him out. Think I´ll freeze my tongue off...Anyone willing to try??
XO XO Debbie Doll
Visit at Tina´s
She lives in 20 square metre, filled with shoes, clothes and papers all over the floor, she hasent used the washing machine in ages and the smell omg, smoke and old leftovers. Now I understand why we always hang out at Carsos.
She even looked like a hillbilly, looks like she hasen´t showered in ages either. What a social case.
I could tell she was embarrassed, and promissed to get a life, she has booked the laundry room tonight, and she´s going to clean her big 20 square appartment tonight when she´s done with her studying.
Atleast she offered me some coffee, euroshopper instant coffee. I don´t know how she can drink that crap, well it´s better than nothing I guess. Maybe I should call anticimex for her, and the psychward?
Xo Xo Debbie Doll
How do you recycle siliconbreats?
Is it soft plastic or hard plastic? Does it matter if you do them cheap or expensive?
Most important of all...does anyone care?
What about a silicon girl (or guy) die do you burn her as a normal person or does she need to be burn as plastic or collected waste products?
XO XO Debbie Doll
Must be from the lost and find draw
Does anyone miss a professor with long white hair, rabbit teeth and awkward clothes?
He is also senile and cant keep a discussion on track for more than a few minutes.
I think that he might be from Brazil because he often talks about their money and their communities and sometimes he says he was supposed to be in Brazil now.
Clearly he is not a real professor so I think the institution took him from the lost and find draw.
Well if anyone is missing him you will find him at MIUN, its the old man who cant
be quiet and doesnt have a clue....You cant miss him!
XO XO Debbie Doll
I finally got proof
Then I got the brilliant idea to contact The Linnean Society, since Carl von Linne categorized the human race in the 1920´s at the racial institute in Uppsala (the first of it's kind). I got the answer that they don´t do this kind of racial studies anymore in Sweden since it´s forbidden and unmoral. But some one has to know about this brand new race, and yesterday a anonymous guy in Lugnvik contacted me by email. He gave me a picture of what he thought was one of those snowrace people, he said he did´nt know anything about them just that he saw it on a roof, so for now the picture is all the public have right now but I promise to dig deeper in to this and let you know if I find anything.
Xo Xo Debbie Doll
Is Bob the Builder objectum sexual?
Have you ever watched Bob the Builder? Its a very popular tv-show for kids and how that show can be allowed for children is a fucking mystery. Let me tell you a little bit about the man himself and how he presents his team:
"Bob and his Can-Do Crew demonstrate the power of positive-thinking, problem-solving, teamwork and follow-through. Most importantly, from start to finish, the team always shows that The Fun Is In Getting It Done"
Ok so far so good but lets take a look at his team, clearly Bob is high on acid since all of his machines are painted in psychedelic colors. Mr Builder has also named his machines and believes that they can talk, so he is obviously schizophrenic and are hearing voices (!!) Lets not forget that this is a show recommended for children....
This drugusing, pretend-to-be-a-builder, cartoon man has a website where he has "fun facts" about his crew
OBS Parental Advisory recommended!
Scoop the digger "loves" to dig holes and move dirt...I guess Bob only has one hole??!!
Dizzy the cement mixer Is the youngest machine on the crew and loves to stand on her rear wheels. Why is she dizzy and what is she mixing and what are Bob puttin in there to mix?
Lofty the crane Timid at first, but always rises to the occation and holds up his end of the job (!!!) Doesnt even need a comment. So much viagra that he turned blue??
Benny the small digger Looks up to Scoop and has given him the nickname "Big Banana"
Mr Bob the Builder there is a diagnosis for people like you OBJECTUM SEXUALITY
But I would like to try your "Can we do it? Yes we can"
XO XO Debbie Doll
The revenge of the shrink
I think she is the person who left a "bomb" outside the hospital today, maybe she catched a diagnosis from one of her clients.
XO XO Debbie Doll
The kids have exaggerated the whole situation
Of some reason the parents didnt like that I took the kids and dogs out in the woods and put them in a cave with a closing rock. Dont understand why they have to make such a big deal out of it.?
Jesus Christ! I mean its not like I just left them their all alone in the dark. The dogs were with them to keep them warm and I also gave them a little flashlight so they could see if a bear was coming. Im sure it was very cozy in there and its not like any kid has died of bein a little bit cold and hungry and getting a little bit of dirt under their nails.
Or... well, one of the cocky parents said that this guy in Austria locked in his kids in the basement for years and that some of them died. Havent heard a word about this man so I think Cocky parents just made it up, and its not like I planned to keep them in there for ever. I picked them up after a couple of hours and they were all still alive. So no damage done.
XO XO Debbie Doll
Parents Conspiracy
Sometimes parents makes me wonder, who teaches them all the knew technology? I know I don´t, it makes me too frustrated it´s like slaming my head in to a wall everytime I´m trying to teach my mom how textmessage with T9. But someone apparently shows them all the new inventions out there. Mum just asked me how "my sharing folders" works. I tried to explain, but our communication is lacking somehow, so I choose to ignore her, thank god for mute buttons.
Im starting to think there is a parent conspiracy somewhere on the webb. A place where parents teach eachother how to use the internet, cellphones and dvd players, and in this place they are so crappy in their teaching skills so they still have to consult their children. Maby this is the punichment for us who invented a parentfree zone wich came to be necessary for human survival.
Im gonna spend the remainings of the evening googeling for the parents internet conspiracy...
XO XO Debbie Doll
Kids and dogs, a match made in hell?
The cake turned out to be a little bit harder to make after lookin up the recipe. The cocky parents decided to add another two year old kid and a rat, well they said it was a dog but the other dogs and I were pretty sure that its a rat pretending to be a high fashion dog. Got news for you love, the clothes doesnt make the dog!
Ok so now theres three of each and the rat cant be outside because its too cold for him (guess your leopard jacket didnt help much in the snow huh?) Tried to take them all for a walk: two buggies, one sledge and two dogs without any leash still a piece of cake to manage. Then the retarded dog choose the perfect time to let me know that he´s deaf, when he ran out the road! Gave up and went home, hope he´s comin home eventually.
Later...
Baby Budda has been screamin for 5 hours straight! My ears are sore, my arms hurts after carrying him around and I think a forgot the rest of the crowd upstairs, Is it really necessary to feed kids before bed? I mean they are just gonna sleep anyway and Ill feed them at breakfast in the morning.
Later...
Put the kids and dogs in a bedroom, locked the door, will sink a beer or two, play the music at top volume and light up a fag. I give up, cocky parents Im sorry, it doesnt take a genius to mind kids and dogs but it do takes a fucking madman to agree to do it without gettin payed like a million dollars.
XO XO Debbie Doll
kids and dogs, piece of cake
Spendin the weekend showing cocky parents that it doenst take a genuis to mind two kids and two dogs for the day and night.
One two year old hooligan, one baby Budda, one retarded 5 year old dog and finally one 3 year old dog with bodysize issues. Like I said, piece of cake for Debbie Doll
XO XO Debbie Doll
Is it really such a good idea to make snowangels in the middle of the road?
Debbie Doll var tvungen att gå ut o röka och då fick hon se två små flickor ligga mitt på vägen och göra snöänglar.
Det hade kanske sett mysigt ut om det inte varit mitt på vägen och om det inte hade varit så att det inte finns någon snö! Snöänglar på asfalt ger liksom inte samma känsla. Samtidigt som detta konstiga änglamakandet pågick fick Debbie Doll se en kille som blev väldigt lycklig bakom en bil...Tänk om jehovas (de som äger Debbie Dolls hus) visste vilka synder som sker när de gått o lagt sig, tror inte några förböner skulle hjälpa mot dessa stackars förtappade själar.
English sub:
Debbie Doll had to go out for a fag and right there, in front of her eyes, in the middle of the road two girls were doin snowangels. I might have been sweet and cozy if they had been somewhere else and if there were any snow!
Snowangels on the concrete doesnt match that well, it doesnt give the same feeling.
Well while the girls were busy makin snowangels, Debbie Doll saw this guy gettin very, very lucky behind a car. She thought about Jehovas (the owner of Debbie Dolls flat) and how they would feel if they knew all the sins going on when they are a sleep. Dont think any prayers can help these poor and lost souls.
XO XO Debbie Doll
Jag ser ljuset! I do see the light
Dödens ljus eller livets ljus? Nu börjar jag tro att det är livets ljus. Hade du däremot frågat tidigare i dag när jag däckade på köksgolvet hade jag svarat dödens ljus. Debbie svor därefter på att ta tag i sina alkoholproblem och det gjorde hon, tills för en timme sedan då hon kände att ett glas vin vore gott. Kan tycka att hon borde lärt sig en läxa men hur kul skulle livet vara då? Nu ligger Debbie Doll i en soffa och pimplar rött, känner hur vackert det är att leva hur kroppen domnar bort så skönt och att det börjar bli dags för dom där kvittrande jävla fåglarna att flytta härifrån.
Någonstans sitter en karamellprins och försöker få kontakt med min porslinshy, tyvärr är han bara en gammal bög
Nu ska lilla Debbie Doll knapra lite tabletter och sedan sova, ty i morgon är det en ny dag med nya bekymmer och ännu mer glädje.
English sub:
The light of death or life? Startin to think that it might be the light of life. Earlier today though, when I passed out on the kitchen floor, I thought it was the light of dead comin to pic me up. Debbie then decided to deal with her alcoholproblems and straighten things up and she did! For about six hours, then the craving for red wine knocked on my door.
You might think that she should have learned her lesson but no, not Debbie Doll and how fun would life be if you only do the right things?! Now she is lying on the sofa with a glass of red wine and she is feeling great, life is wonderful, gettin all sleepy and relaxed. And those birds who are disturbing my life with their chirping are soon to be gone for warmer countries.
There is a little candyprince out there wishing he could touch my porcelain skin, unfortunately its not gonna happen because he is just and old fag.Debbie Doll are now heading to the medicincabinet for some pills and then go to sleep because there will be a new day tomorrow wwoth new troubles and more joy!
XO XO Debbie Doll
Can we do it? Yes we can!
Svensk sub:
Gårdagen var onekligen intressant på mer än ett sätt, Debbie hade både händer och mun full, so to speak.
Dagen började seriöst med föreläsning om kapital och organisation, Yngve är verkligen the bomb!
Lärde mig den ovärderliga kunskapen att man kan säga både I Globen och PÅ Globen, beroende på vad man ska dit och göra. Det känns fantastiskt att veta att om en klient undrar över detta (istället för att få hjälp med sitt sociala problem)så kan jag svaret.
Rullade sedan vidare till sjukan med olloll och där mitt i väntrummet hittade jag vår framtids stora ledare inom socialt arbete. Fick veta att läsa till Socionom var onödigt eftersom man bara får lära sig en massa dravel och att det allra viktigaste faktiskt är att ha egen erfarenhet. (!?) Gav som förslag att han kunde öppna ett eget behandlingshem där det råder total drogfrihet. Jag menar om det bara är erfarenhet som behövs så måste ju missbrukarna vara experter på att sluta....eller?! Knepiga jävel
Efter detta möte kunde det ju inte annat än gå åt helvete med resten av dagen, kvällen och natten. Kan säga att det är fan inte lätt att sänka en skattefri dunk när man inte är mer än en liten Debbie Doll på 10 cm.
Flickorna kom över och det blev lite twister, sen krogen och många glas alkohol senare kom jag hem o med mig hade jag modellen. Han påstod att han var en riktig modell men med tanke på hans storlek på kuken tror jag nog att han är porrmodell.
English sub:
Well, yesterday was interesting to say the least, Debbie Doll had her hands and mouth full, so to speak.
It srtaed very seriously, had a lecture about organisation and welfare, just love my teacher, Yngve is such a bomb! He was kind enough to explain for our class that you can either say ON an Island or IN an Island. Its such a valuable thing to know and Im sure the klients will ask about this when they are coming to the social services...??!!!
Also Went to the hospital with granny and there in the waiting room we were blessed to sit with Swedens next big leader in social work. He told us that he dropped out of social work school because you cant learn anything there anyway. He was kind enough to tell us all about his drugproblems and that he have had several psychosis and that the only thing that matters when you are working with addicts is to have your own experience of addiction. I told him to start his own rehabcenter where it would be ok for the klients to use drugs. I mean if experience of using is the only thing you need to treat them well then a bunch of addicts would be experts in comin off the addiction....or not???!!!! Gosh what a stupid and Crazy sun of a bitch!
So after that meating the rest of the day, evening and night followed a very steep path. I´ll tell you its not fucking easy to empty a box of wine when you are only 10 cm high. Well the girls came over and we played some twister and got drunk. Went clubin and many, many, many glass of alcohol later I finally decided to go home and when i got to my door I noticed that I had the model with me. He said he was a real model but after seein the size of his cock Im sure he is a pornmodel.
XO XO Debbie Doll
